So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
