How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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