yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Randomize
