saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
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