I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
