The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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