my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
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