There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
