Define "chronic" masturbator.
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Randomize
