I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
If I die, sorry about rent.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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