I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Sorry about my life...
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Randomize
