Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
This is not my ceiling
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Randomize
