Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
