I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
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