I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize