how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Randomize
