all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
