I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
