wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
