no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
