Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
