You really coming over, don't trick.
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
