are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Randomize
