Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize
