I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize
