thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
