i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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