no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I supernannyed him into submission
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
