Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
