no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Pants are for mortals
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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