i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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