their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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