You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize
