I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
