Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
My ATM looks so different sober.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I believe in your delicious
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
