you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
