Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i would punch a child for taco bell
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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