ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
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