yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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