still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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