What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
