Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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