nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I just want to make out with him forever
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
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