I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
We talked him into tasing himself.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Randomize