Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
