we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
