Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
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