if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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