I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Randomize
