I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize